The Importance of Self-Care and Finding your Peace

Written by Lisa Cadman, 25/08/2021

Where, doing what, and with whom, do you feel most at peace? This is such an important question to ask yourself as you go through your life.

I have had more time on my own than ever before over the last two years, during the period I was off with my ankle injury, and since, during the many Covid lockdowns. I have always been happy with my own company, but though 2020-2021, I feel there has been an extra shift. There has been a realisation that it’s not only important to like ourselves and enjoy our own company, but to actually thrive within that. To let go of the things, or the people, who threaten the peace in our hearts, and embrace those who lift us up and support us. To make time to do things that bring us joy, and to go a bit easy on ourselves sometimes too. I think turning 50 this month, has also made me evaluate things more, and look towards my future. Growing older is a privilege denied to many, so we need to make our days count.

The photos I’ve used in this months blog are all ones I have taken myself, from a ‘self-care’ weekend I just had, where I stayed 2 nights in an Airbnb in Hever, Kent (with birthday money from my family and friends). I visited my favourite place Hever Castle, and some National Trust gardens too, for some rest and relaxation.

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There will always be ups and downs in life, good times and bad. Sometimes we need to be the ‘supporter’ and other times we need the support. But when it comes down to it, we need to be our own greatest champion, and have faith in ourselves. We must recognise what makes us feel safe, what makes us feel peaceful, calm and happy. On the other side of that, we need to be honest about what, or who, makes us feel stressed, brings unwanted drama or unhappiness into our lives.

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We all have work stress from time to time, and stress at home too. But it is working out what changes we can make to these things, to ease the pressure and bring the peace. What your priorities are, and what feeds you emotionally and physically. A basic level of stress can be good, as it motivates us to get out of bed and get going each day. High levels of stress all the time though, affect us in a negative way, manifesting as physical symptoms, or we can see our mental health suffer. We must also try to learn to set our own boundaries, in terms of what we will, or won’t accept from others, and how much time and energy we are able to give to a person, a job or other projects.

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What makes you feel happy? Do more of that. What makes you feel calm? Do more of that. Who makes you feel loved and appreciated? Make time for those people however busy you are, and support them whenever you can. Who makes you feel not good enough or unappreciated? Distance yourself a bit, or cut yourself free if necessary. Work out what things you need in your life, to feel happy, calm and fulfilled, and do your very best to fill your life with those.

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The greatest thing that has helped me these past two years is being in nature. I have discovered places I’ve not found before.

This month I have been doing a ’62 Miles in August’ fundraiser for Refuge – a charity that supports women and children who suffer from domestic abuse. You have to walk 2 miles a day (or 62 miles over the month) and I’ve enjoyed having a really good reason to get out and about each day, and will definitely be keeping it up after the challenge ends. I’ve had some fantastic support and sponsorship from friends and family, and have passed the target by walking 78 miles so far (and have raised £770 in sponsorship), and I am now aiming for 100 miles instead of the 62 miles by the end of the month, as a personal challenge.

To make the walks more interesting, I joined the National Trust, and am slowly working my way around the various local places! I have so far been to Polesden Lacey, Winkworth Arboretum, Chartwell, Emmetts Gardens and Chiddingstone Village, and am hoping to find many more, whenever I have any free time.

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Walking in the gardens and around the lakes, and seeing the beautiful houses brings me peace and tranquility. They are safe spaces to visit during this pandemic as they are mainly outdoors, so you can safely walk at a distance from others, and appreciate all the different species of plants, flowers and trees. I have also visited my favourite place Hever Castle several times this year – I find this a very peaceful and magical place indeed, as well as Ramster Gardens just outside Chiddingfold, which is also beautiful.

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I have got more into my reading during this period too, and have found it very relaxing to just sit for a bit (usually with Colin the Cat on my lap!). Allowing yourself time off the ‘chores’ (that will always be there) to get lost in someone else’s story is truly wonderful.

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Since things re-opened a bit, it has been lovely to catch up with family and a few good friends too, for coffee or dinner – we have all missed out socially these past 2 years, so it is good to re-connect when we can. I’m lucky to have a wonderful family and some fantastic friends who have been by my side when I have needed the support… and who I in turn, have supported during these really challenging and difficult times.

Self-care doesn’t have to cost anything – it really can be as simple as making time to make your favourite coffee just how you like it, sitting in the garden listening to the birds for a few minutes, baking a cake, reading a book, taking a walk in a local park, taking time to speak with a good friend on the phone or in person, running yourself a lovely bath, getting involved in a craft activity, taking time to get cosy and watch your favourite tv show or movie, or going for a run or a cycle if that’s your thing! Anything that relaxes you and brings you joy is time very well spent.

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Refuge charity : if you would like to support my fundraiser – it is open on Facebook until 1st September – just drop me a message, and I’ll send you the link. If you, or anyone you know, might need their help, or if you would like to set up a fundraiser yourself for this amazing charity, you can find out everything you need to know on their website: www.refuge.org.uk. There is also the National Domestic Abuse Helpline on: 0808 2000 247, or visit: www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk.

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If you would like to discuss any ways in which my treatments or products might be able to help you, please do not hesitate to contact me on: 07710 173354 or email me at: lisa@soulspace.biz. I would really love to hear from you.

With all my love and hugs, please stay relaxed and happy all. See you next month!

Lisa
xXx

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